A middle-aged man dreaming of the day when he can stop begging for scraps and write for a living.

Monday, September 15, 2008

What the Phoenix New Times thinks of John McCain

Hmm...reading an article from a local newspaper in McCain's constituency, I'm finding a lot of interesting tidbits.

Those who survive will be the sociopaths who can tell a lie with the most sincere, straight face. You are especially adept at this.


A man of integrity.

No one forgets that Glenn was the first American astronaut to orbit the Earth. You won't let anyone forget that you were a prisoner of war. But you have played that tune too long. By now your constant reminders about your war record make you seem like a modern version of Arthur Miller's tragic failure Willy Loman.


But he doesn't like to talk about his days as a POW.  He doesn't try to use it for political capital.

Just keep telling everyone that it was your wife's money invested in that shopping center with Keating and that you knew nothing about it.


A man of change.  Lots of change.  Change for a five, a ten, even a hundred.

Maybe the voters will understand you took those tiring trips to Charlie's place in the Bahamas in their behalf. Certainly, they can understand you wanted to take your family along. A senator deserves to travel on private jets, removed from the awful crush of public transportation.


Truly, a man of the people.

You're John McCain, clearly the guiltiest, most culpable and reprehensible of the Keating Five. But you know the power of television and you realize this is the only way you can possibly save your political career.


Bear in mind, these statements were made in 1989.

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